Coyote Moon (coyote_moon) wrote,
Coyote Moon

Push me around

So work is complicated right now. Made more difficult by the fact that I gave my notice. Said I'd stay until the end of the year and no longer. Then complications increased 10 fold when I let myself be talked into staying. Not because I want to stay but because there is this incessant buzz. . .

We need a new car
Our sewage pipe collapsed
Christmas is coming
The economy is bad
Our business isn't ready yet
I like my boss
I feel bad he's in a slump
And so on

So I made a decision that is not brave. It is not what I want. I try to play it off like it is in the best interest of my family, but really I am just scared.
I'm supposed to believe that god takes care of the birds and the smallest creatures, why would he not care for me? Isn't it obvious. I will not let him.

When will I be brave again? Or was I never brave?

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